DAY+148+Conflict+Cycle

Day 148 Conflict Cycle



1. A stressful event occurs (i.e., frustration, failure) which **ACTIVATES** a troubled student's irrational beliefs (i.e., "Nothing good ever happens to me!" "Adults are unfair"') which in turn defines it as a stressful event.
 * THE SEQUENCE OF THE CONFLICT CYCLE **

2. These negative beliefs and thoughts determine and **TRIGGER** the intensity of the student's feelings.

3. These feelings and not the student's rational forces **DRIVE** his or her inappropriate behaviors.

4. The inappropriate behaviors (yelling, threatening, sarcasm, refusing to speak) **INCITE** adults/peers.

5. Adults/peers not only pick up the student's feelings, but also they frequently **MIRROR** the student's behaviors (yell back, threaten, etc.).

6 This negative **REACTION** increases the student's stress escalating the conflict into a self-defeating power struggle.

7. Although the student may lose the battle (i.e., he or she is punished), the student wins the war! His or her **SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY** (ie., irrational beliefs) is **REINFORCED** and therefore, he or she has no motivation to change or alter the irrational beliefs or inappropriate behaviors.